Big Fan is a deeply disturbing movie. I don't know how to classify it. People have been quick to throw the word funny in their descriptions of the movie, but though the audience does laugh at various points in the film, I never found myself even close to a laugh. In fact, the scenes where people were laughing were the very ones I found so intense that I looked away from the screen. Big Fan is a movie about just that. It follows the life of a loser obsessed football fan Paul (played by Patton Oswalt a comedian by history). Paul is never that type of loser which we've seen so ritualistically glorified recently. I'm thinking the spawn of Apatow like Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill who have fully come into their own selves in this loser-obsessed entertainment age. No, Paul is the classic loser. Fat. Mid thirties. Unkempt. Chronic Masterbater. Lives with his mom. Parking Garage Attendant. The only thing Paul has in his life is his favorite team, the New York Giants.

The movie forces the audience to stare directly into the face of a loser (lots of closeup shots) and decide whether or not there is a problem. Paul's entire life is the New york Giants. Their success directly corresponds to his own position in the world. His happiness is predicated on a 60 minute game. It's an obsession and an addiction like anything else and we travel with Paul through his highs and his deepest lows. Towards the very beginning we hear Paul's first rant on sports radio assaulting whatever team the Giants are playing that week. His words were written and rehearsed for hours before his triumphant moment in the spotlight as Paul from Staten Island as a caller on 1am talk radio. After a particularly derailing rant against the Eagles he hangs up the phone and lies back in bed with utter satisfaction. The last shot we see is him reaching off camera and returning with lotion and some kleenex in his hands. His sexual gratification comes from not the game necessarily, but his role as their herald. In his eyes he is as part of the team as any of the players. No matter that he can't even afford tickets and instead watches the game on a tv hooked up to his car in the parking lot of the stadium, 200 yards from the actual game.

As I said earlier I found the movie disgustingly disturbing. On many occassions I had to look away because of Oswalt's performance which was so bare. I still don't know what to think, but I think that is where the director wants us. Paul is not likeable and he is no sense a hero. He is a gross man with no life. The conflict of the movie has to do with the separation of Paul and the Giants. The entire movie I found myself pleading with him in my head to wake up and do something. To make moves to improve his person I guess and construct a life of meaning. But now that I think about it I'm not sure what would be left of him without the game. There is a surprisingly poignant montage of Paul going about his weekly business in between games. The scenes are of him walking around some streets, eating in various places, taking a nap on a couch, and looking across the water. The scenes are all repeated at least twice and he is alone in all of them. If he didn't have Sunday football it's entirely feasible he would just disappear from the planet, another lost soul who entered this world at the wrong time. What else are his choices? We meet his brother and his life is hardly more appealing than Paul's. He is a Staten Island guido, a phony lawyer and a phony family man. His obsession with money and his strict adherence to some glorified notion of family is represented as being as puny as Paul's childish love for his team.

So what is our responsibility to the self-described losers? The whole movie I asked myself if Paul needed help. I mean he appeared fully cognizant and self-aware, but his life is so limited that the smallest fumble or loss threw him into an upheavel of terrifying results. Where should the line be drawn in helping people like Paul? There was no indication he actually suffered from a social disorder and even if he did shouldn't it be his decision whether or not to seek help? When his mother said "you won't get through to him, no one can" we realize that she's right. He's as set in his ways as the clearly defined season schedule. All Paul wants in life is consistency, and if that consistency means he never leaves his Mom's house, should we force him to? Should Paul be treated as an addict or should he be left to himself?

 If anyone else has seen this movie I'd be interested in discussing whether or not you thought he underwent change from beginning to end. I'm still not sure