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Kids Room General Spacing kids
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Spacing kids
I’d like some advice on spacing kids. I’ve heard 2-3 years is optimal but I know several people who were a year apart and very close. I would worry this would lead to a lot of competition and fighting in general, though. What are others’ experiences?
My opinion is  4-5 years. Of course it depends on how many you want, your age and so on. What’s good in 5 years is that the elder has a lot of private time with the parents, and the younger has an elder brother who is old enough to learn from. They have enough of a distance to not share the same friends circle which could be annoying, and also their fighting is a bit more limited (not by much though). After a couple of years you can even have the elder babysit the younger, but that really depend on how they grow up and how dependable they are.

Also for you, it gives some time to recover from the first and get back to real life, which is then easier to somewhat keep with the second child. I know some people think that, well, while I’m at it, let’s get it over with, and not waste/spend all this time not working and taking care of them. Perhaps this is valid, but then they don’t always manage to exit from that being several years out of commission so to say.

But then, I know people for whom 3 years worked great.

Is it by chance that the difference between me and my brother is 4-5 years? Perhaps, but I would expect this tendency to continue in future posts, at least for people who like their siblings, and/or themselves.
2-3 years sounds sensible. It gives kids an opportunity to interact with someone close, from an early age. The older gets to teach, but often also to learn from the younger. Of course, as time goes on, interests can diverge, but if they're close when they're young, they can often keep the friendship close. One of the tricks for parents is to consider how much to engage and how to engage. How often to let siblings sort out their differences, and when (or how) to step in. It's a tricky issue, perhaps one that deserves a separate discussion?
I am a mother of five girls between the ages of 9 and 14 months and I have to say that eventhough it is hard work the closeness between my girls is worth it all.I always knew that if I had children it would be one after the other I think that large age gaps cause jealousy and selfcentered behaviour unlike children who grow up close to each other.
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Latest Post: April 9, 2010 at 3:12 AM
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