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Library Authors Etgar Keret A conversation with Etgar Keret The effects of living as a fictional character
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Etgar Keret - A conversation with Etgar Keret

The effects of living as a fictional character
This is the first question I posed to Etgar in A conversation with Etgar Keret.

A question which I find fascinating is the effect on authors and actors of living with a problematic fictional character of theirs. For example, Nabokov had to live as Humbert Humbert, a pedophile, for a long time while writing Lolita and probably later. To write well about them you become them, and this becoming has to affect you. Many of Etgar Keret's characters are problematic, or harsh. How does it feel to be them, and more importantly, to have been them for a while? How does being them affect you, in the long run?
Books Discussed
Lolita (Turtleback School & Library Binding Edition) (Vintage International (Pb))
by Vladimir Nabokov

(Transcription from the conversation.)

I think I’m a very harsh person. How to say, a wolf in lamb’s clothing. I look very relaxed but I’m a very harsh and aggressive person. I think it has to do with my upbringing because I’m a child of two holocaust survivors - my mother saw her mother and father killed in front of her eyes. I grew up with this notion that I feel all kinds of urges that I need to ignore. Something that was completely built in. When as a child I fell off the bike and fractured my skull, they took me to hospital, and because the injury was close to the brain they couldn’t use antiseptic. When they stitched me my mother was in the room, and when they saw I didn’t cry they thought something was wrong with my head. When you put a needle in a 7 year old’s head 36 times he usually cries. My doctor said to me: “Hey little boy, does this hurt you.” And I said, “How about you shut up and do your work. And I’ll just lie here until you finish.” My family likes to tell this story, but it’s really a story about repression. Sometimes an interviewer will ask me a question and I just want to strangle them [Was he talking about me? – AP] but I’ll still answer it very politely.

In that case I think there is something about fiction that it’s a space where you can be yourself. In my life there were hundreds of girls that I felt like kissing while talking to them but I understood it would be out of line, but in my stories my characters can kiss them. What you say harsh in them is basically an inner knowledge of me as a writer that their actions don’t have any consequence on other human beings. Let’s say that my character kicks a kid in the park, but no kid gets kicked. You can kill somebody but no one gets killed. So this makes it a perfect place for an emotional laboratory where you can ask yourself what am I feeling. If I can just be myself what would I do? Of course we are social animals so I wouldn’t want to act like my characters in the real world, but I acknowledge the feeling in my story.

In response to Etgar Keret
Right, but so for example let’s take an actor. Also, no one exactly gets hurt, but they act as a certain character, and also for your stories, you need to act as a certain character, for example the child murderer in your story After the end. It still has, I think, some effect, even if you know that no one really gets hurt.

In response to Assaf Peretz
Well, you know I think it has an effect, but it’s actually a kind of positive one, because I think that, at least for a long period of my life, I lived under a complete suppression, I didn’t even acknowledge those urges. But let’s say when now I go with my kid to a park, and another kid pushes him, and I say to him “Hey little kiddie, you’re supposed to play nice,” then the fact that I don’t beat the shit out of this little kid has to do with the fact that I write. Because before that, I would just have hemorrhoids instead. So I think it actually kind of creates an emotional connection.

I don’t know, I bet for actors it might be difficult to make this distinction, between the real world and the fictional one. I know that for let’s say some actors, like Daniel Day-Lewis, that when they’re out of the set they still act in character.  But with me, I really think that if I sit in front of you, I can really acknowledge the fact that I feel like punching you, or kissing you, but at the same time, I can distinguish this is the real world; I want to do it, but I won’t do it because you don’t deserve a punch (or a kiss).

So unlike an actor who speaks in an accent, realizing my character just means that there is some sort of mute switch, or off switch, which is all the time there, and when I write I exercise it, and when I don’t write I just sort of feel it or think it.
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