THINQon : Virgos, Women, Jews, Blacks, American, and other groups.

The Living Room Psychology and character Virgos, Women, Jews, Blacks, American, and other groups.

THINQon is a platform for a more intelligent web. It aims to replace the ruling paradigm of the web – that of sharing and gathering information – with a sharing and achieving of understanding. Instead of the Q&A model it offers an experience. A platform for discovery of ideas, people, and yourself. Continue >

Chris Utterman

Virgos, Women, Jews, Blacks, American, and other groups.

Latest Post: January 14, 2012 at 8:31 PM

28 followers

Linda OReilly made a really brilliant point in post describing, as I read it, how after hearing so many times different men saying disparaging things about women you stop hearing it said by specific men, on specific women, and start hearing it said by “Men” on “Women,” or "Man" on "Woman."

At what point do we become a member of a group instead of an individual?

I recently talked to a friend of mine, a Virgo, who complained about how no one ever says anything good about Virgos! People love Scorpios , and have good things to say about most signs (Libras are beautiful etc.) but the only good thing people say about Virgos is how they like to arrange things. How would the supermarket items be categorized if it weren’t for Virgos – that’s it, that’s as good as it gets for Virgos. My friend was truly upset about that. How with all the crackpots online (even someone here posting how history started 400 years ago) you can’t find anyone with good opinions about Virgos.

Why were they upset? Whatever large group you are a member of you feel uncomfortable if people are disparaging about this group. People are quick to become patriotic when your country is attacked, speaking figuratively and literally.

One also sees the important aspect of movement such as Black is Beautiful as a way to give groups a positive aspect and disassociating them from negative ones.

Returning to my question, at what point do we feel as a member of a group instead of an individual? At what point do we react to another as a group member rather than an individual? (Both ourselves as a group member, and them as a group member.) We should never do that, but after enough repetition…?

Reply to:

Solveig Wright, Where to begin?

January 13, 2012 at 1:57 PM

33 followers

Chris, I saw this topic again and thought I'd reply.
I'd say a substantial distinction is whether or not your membership in the group is voluntary. I suspect most people would find the statement "all people born in June are smooth talkers" more annoying than "all consultants are smooth talkers." It's not fun when your favorite group gets picked on, but the layer of biological determinism adds insult to injury.

I imagine this will become even more exacerbated as arguments "from evolution" become more commonplace. My personal pet peeve is when people try to explain facets of human nature, especially shortcomings they don't want to have to work on, by concocting elaborate explanations from evolution. "Men are naturally hunters, you want us to take out the garbage?" Well then, wouldn't hunters instinctively know not to keep food scraps in the camp where they would increase the risk of attack from bears?

For the record, some of my best friends are Virgos. :)

Reply to: or

Winifred Beam Kessler

January 14, 2012 at 8:31 PM

5 followers

"At what point do we become a member of a group instead of an individual?"

This statement poses the vital question:

What "groups" are we born into and which do we choose is the to underlying question. For each person, IMO, developing the ability to distinguish between the "givens" and the "chosens" is the central skill for living a healthy life. The further refinement is acknowledging that we need to be taught how to choose wisely by learning through the help of wise teachers, mentors, models and therapists how to make those decisions.